My Personal Seinfeld

Recent conversations this past month (not all paintball related) led me to consider writing about Intrinsic Motivation. This is when our behavior is driven by internal rewards, not external. Then a few other conversations steered me towards the topic of “righting the ship” (see what I did there?) and how to fix a struggling program or player. Then the idea of having another guest blogger popped up because a recent conversation at a wedding brought up an interesting topic. I guess I should be thankful I have 3 potential topics lined up. And I am.

Then I realized… this blog really has evolved over the years from a “this is what my paintball team is doing and why” to a “how to” from a coaching perspective and eventually to what it is today – an amalgamation of my personal psychological, tactical, strategic, and leadership experiences and approaches applied to the sport of tournament paintball.

And that can get tiring.

So what I want to talk about this month is… nothing.

The old man and his dog

That’s right, the topic will be nothing specific. Rather this will be more of a steam of thought (nothing new there) about how I personally overcome obstacles and what led me to write this blog in the first place (in a broad sense). If you read that last line and are still reading… thank you. Hopefully, what follows can help someone.

Life can and usually is, filled with missed opportunities. Usually from fear of failure, the unknown, injury, embarrassment… But what is fear really? Fear is essentially a signal of danger, a threat, or motivational conflict. It manifests psychologically and physiologically (that’s mentally and physically). There is a lot of it out in the world today, much of it unnecessary. So I thought maybe we might touch on a microcosm of it this month.

I started writing this Blog (albeit under a different title and perspective) in 2010. There was no fear of doing so because it was just going to be a chronicle of a team I was playing with and I was going to have help. But as it evolved and Zen was born, there came doubts. And that was okay. It has turned into something that, based off feedback, has helped a few people out. In addition to that, it has helped me as an individual grow in a path I didn’t think was ever planned or possible for that matter. And that all happened because of how I approach my fears.

Fear only exists in our minds. We ultimately control it and it’s effects on us. I had no real idea what I was doing when I stepped into this world of blogging, coaching, and clinics. All I had was my experiences and ideas. Would they be good enough? Would I write something that was perceived as “stupid”? Would anyone care? Am I sure I want to put myself, my thoughts, and my ways out into public domain for consumption and scrutiny?

Of course those thoughts arose… but they didn’t stop me. I never really thought about it until now. But I understand it more now than ever.

I think my background in the martial arts helped prepare me for the endeavor as it did for many things. My martial background taught me numerous things about fear, limitations, and more. As I trained (when I was younger), I overcame many fears and doubts. I got faster, stronger, more confident. Ultimately, it taught me that getting out of my comfort zone was where the greatest growth was found and accomplished. For the record, that fear was accompanied by lots of injury and pain. And if those components don’t teach you something, nothing will.

Becoming a fighter is not easy just like becoming a good paintball player isn’t. All the same principles apply in both worlds in order to meet success. Whether it is being physically fit, having a solid foundation in fundamentals, training, you name it, both require a lot of WORK. If you are adverse to hard work or like to take short cuts, you will not succeed and if you do succeed, you either have an incredible natural born and God given talent… or you cheated.

My work outs are a lot different than when I was younger. But don’t stop.

As my confidence grew when I was younger, so did my willingness to step out of my comfort zones. The willingness to learn, the willingness to understand differing thoughts and perspectives, all helped me recognize there are a myriad of ways to train and prepare. I was exposed to different styles, philosophies, and training methods. All strong in one way or the other but many with flaws too.

I also began to push my own limits. Where were they? Where is my envelope? This also opened my eyes to believe the only limit… is you/me.

The key to all of this, besides having an open mind, was adaptability. If you are so rigid, so set in your way that only your way will suffice, you’re missing out. If you want to stay with what you know and what is familiar, that’s fear rearing its head. It’s “safe”. Change can manifest growth… or, it could prove that maybe your way IS the right way… or it can IMPROVE your way… this is adaptability. And it is paramount to being a successful PB player (just like being a fighter).

Nobody is perfect. But should we settle for where we are? Do you strive to be the best you can be? Whether it is being a better PB player, accountant, Dad, friend, ditch digger… I’m constantly learning. As a matter of fact, I love watching lower divisional players. Why? Because you can learn from them too! And they ask great questions that we all need to be reminded of from time to time. Remember your fears and how you overcame them when first starting PB? When you meet a new player, do you empathize with them when they ask you a question? Do you recognize your opportunity to help them? Well… do ya?

Identifying opportunities in others


We shouldn’t be afraid to expose our weaknesses. Once we recognize them, accept them, we can work on them. And, if done correctly, turn them into strengths. But guess what that takes? Yep… hard work. Like all things in life, you have to commit. You want to fix something in your game? Put yourself in scenarios that will make you face your weaknesses or shore up your strengths so much they compensate. Trust me, when you are no longer afraid to make mistakes or deal with your weaknesses, you will improve.

Be water my friends